This is one of those posts that is really more for myself than anyone. Feel free to skip over it, it's not funny, it's a bit on the whiny side, and really it's depressing. (and it has a pinch of political in it... i think that's a first for this blog)
Money Woes have been on my mind lately. :(
Obviously with the holidays around my spending has increased. Luckily, I budgeted for this, so I'm fine, but somehow unexpected expenses always arise! My check engine light has been on for a while... like... 2 months or something like that. I have been trying to avoid it, but the opportunity to go to San Diego for New Years arose, so I thought I should get the light checked out in case I drive down. (Depending on airline deals and gas money, it can be cheaper to drive than to fly and right now I'm all for what's cheapest. I digress...) The last time it came on was a couple years ago and there was something wrong with the car's internal computer. Luckily that was under warranty, so they fixed it. I was hoping this time whatever the problem was would also be under warranty. Unfortunately, it was not. I ended up having to pay $600 to fix my car. :( Boo!! And on top of that, they gave me some recommendations for other things that need to be fixed. One of which I should probably take care of in the next couple months so that the axle doesn't need to be replaced, which would cost even more $$. In the grand scheme of things, putting a couple hundred dollars into the car, every couple of years is no big deal. I mean the car is 13 years old! But, when you're still looking for work, every penny counts!
I've been pretty lucky lately with being able to do things on a budget. Hanging out with friends is free and I always enjoy that. Also it doesn't hurt when the friend is baking and I get to sample yummy treats! (Thanks Jen!) hee hee. I was invited to go to the Sharks game on Friday night with Steph. It was last minute, as her husband couldn't make it because of work, but still it was free and fun! I have discounted tickets for the movie theatre, so I don't have to pay the ridiculous amount to see a non-matinee movie. Also, my sister as graciously allowed me to be added to her Netflix (since I canceled mine when I lost my job) without contributing yet.
I hate feeling indebted to people and I've felt that a lot lately. Especially because it's not that I have no money. If that was the case, you'd probably see my stuffing tacos at Taco Bell (if they're even hiring). I'm not at the point yet where I have to take any ol' job that I'm over qualified for. I am however, preparing so that I don't have to be in that position for a while. I have budgeted enough to be able to continue to pay my COBRA benefits (which will triple next month because the COBRA subsidy ends for me). There are 2 bills right now that will help me tremendously. 1 is in the House, the other in the Senate. Both would increase the length of the subsidy. One would increase the amount the subsidy is for. I can manage on the current amount, so increasing the % is not a big deal to me, but it probably is to a lot of other people. I hope they make decisions on it soon, so I don't have to pay the increased premium for very long. I'll be keeping it for January in hopes of the bills being signed in, but in the mean time I'm looking for other, cheaper options.
...wait... that's not quite where I was going with that paragraph. I was trying to say that I feel indebted to people lately. I've always been of the mindset where I like things even. I don't like feeling like I owe people things. Money, food, gas, time, anything. I don't like feeling like I've spent more of someone else's something than they have of mine. So, I've try to be even about things. If someone drove somewhere once, I drive the next time. If someone bought something once, I buy the next time. That sort've stuff. It works out well when living with roommates and I think it makes for happier friendships. I mean, I don't mind doing extra things for friends, it just shows how much I care about them, but I get down on myself when I feel like my friend has gone out of their way for me and I haven't been able to reciprocate that kind've generosity. ... In short, it's been hard on my lately. Feeling like I owe people things, whether it's my family or my friends. I don't like this feeling at all. I feel like the little that I do, isn't good enough. The looks on their faces tell me otherwise, and I know that they understand my situation, but I still feel like I'm not pulling my weight.
