I don't go to church, I rarely read the bible, I pray only in dire situations, but I consider myself Catholic and I particpate in Lent. Strange, right? I have been known to have religious conversations with friends and the thought of demons and humanizing the devil freak me out. For instance, a friend of mine told me once about how he frequently has "dreams" of someone that looks just like him except with blonde hair (he as dark brown hair) staring over him menacingly and reaching out to him on occasion. He said he researched about it on the internet and supposedly it is his ... anti-angel? I don't know how to descirbe it, but it is basically the opposite of a guardian angel... instead it is something sent by Satan to tempt you. That freaked me out and for the longest time I refused to sleep over at this guy's house (he was just a friend, never anything more, completely platonic). Even typing that out names me anxious/nervous. Again... strange, right? ... I digress... the point of this post was to discuss my actions for Lent this year.
Lent 2009
I have been trying to lose weight for as long as I can remember (okay that was an exaggeration, but it has been a very long time). Some things work, some things don't. This year for lent I have decided to give up fast food burgers and fries and the all too-easy, too-good Taco Bell. It's just under a week into lent and I've been on track so-far (with the exception of forgetting that I shouldn't have red meat on fridays... oops). The only down-fall is that I feel like this isn't enough. This isn't much of a sacrifice as my resolution has loop-holes. So I was thinking of adding more to it... I think I should force myself to work-out during this time. Working out is my all-time weight-loss pitfall. I absolutely hate working out because I'm so ashamed of my body and my out-of-shapeness that it sadens me. I think back to when I was active and wouldn't get out of breath going up a flight of stairs and I go on a downward spiral thinking about how I got to this stage of my life.
I know what I need to do, but how do I get myself to do it? I hope that Lent is the answer, but I can't say for sure. I have the ideas and I know the reasons behind why I should do these things and what should motivate me to do them, but I lack something that actually makes me get up and do it... hmm..
wow, this post took a 180 degree turn, didn't it? haha It's 6am and I've been up since noon... that's my excuse. :-p
it sounds like you're starting with something great! giving up something that's good and easy when it comes to food is very difficult, i don't think you're giving yourself enough credit.
ReplyDeletei HATE working out.. i do it like once every couple weeks. bleh. and it's not like i don't have time.. i just would rather hang out with juno and kris than do anything else. i'll let you know if i find anything that magically motivates me. hehe!